a bunch of quotes, with a present at the end

It's hard enough to be taken seriously in the struggle for gay rights without having a bunch of straight girls running around kissing each other to get the attention of boys and videocameras.  ~M. Robin D'Antan, 2002


Pronouns make it hard to keep our sexual orientation a secret when our co-workers ask us about our weekend.  "I had a great time with... them."  Great!  Now they don't think you're queer - just a big slut!  ~Judy Carter


I can't help looking gay.  I put on a dress and people say, "Who's the dyke in the dress?"  ~Karen Ripley 


The next time someone asks you, "Hey, howdja get to be a homosexual anyway?" tell them, "Homosexuals are chosen first on talent, then interview... then the swimsuit and evening gown competition pretty much gets rid of the rest of them."  ~Karen Williams 


My mom blames California for me being a lesbian.  "Everything was fine until you moved out there."  "That's right, Mom, we have mandatory lesbianism in West Hollywood.  The Gay Patrol busted me, and I was given seven business days to add a significant amount of flannel to my wardrobe.  ~Coley Sohn









The diagnosis of homosexuality as a "disorder" is a contributing factor to the pathology of those homosexuals who do become mentally ill.... Nothing is more likely to make you sick than being constantly told that you are sick.  ~Ronald Gold

 
Never be bullied into silence.  Never allow yourself to be made a victim.  Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself


Never apologize for showing feeling.  When you do so, you apologize for the truth.  ~Benjamin Disraeli


If God had wanted me otherwise, He would have created me otherwise.  ~Johann von Goethe 


You learn to like someone when you find out what makes them laugh, but you can never truly love someone until you find out what makes them cry.  ~Author Unknown
  

I've fallen in love many times... always with you.  ~Author Unknown





A loyal friend laughs at your jokes when they're not so good, and sympathizes with your problems when they're not so bad.  ~Arnold H. Glasgow


You can always tell a real friend:  when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.  ~Laurence J. Peter


Friends are those rare people who ask how you are and then wait for the answer.  ~Author Unknown


It is the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter.  ~Marlene Dietrich (how many of us have that friend we can call up at 4 a.m.?) 



Friends can be said to "fall in like" with as profound a thud as romantic partners fall in love.  ~Letty Cottin Pogrebin

 
If you're alone, I'll be your shadow.  If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder.  If you want a hug, I'll be your pillow.  If you need to be happy, I'll be your smile.  But anytime you need a friend, I'll just be me.  ~Author Unknown


I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar, but I cherish the friend who for me does not consult his calendar.  ~Robert Brault




HERE'S THE PRESENT!!!!!!!!!!
















Rizzoli & Isles Bingo Card #1. Created by Ebenn27
 

Maura uses Hand Sanitizer	Jane and Maura do something date-like	Awkward Date moment	Angela calls Jane	Jane convinces Maura to try something
Maura uses really big words	Jane draws her gun	Maura talks to Bass	Someone Dies	Maura identifies a Redish Brown Stain
Someone goes to the Dirty Robber	Maura goes shoe shopping (online or otherwise)	Free Space Subtext Square	Using the Dead Person Fridge	Alcohol is consumed
Maura convinces Jane to try something	Jane asks Maura to explain something	Someone Pesters Jane about her Love Life	Jane pulls rank on Frankie	Maura and Jane have a sleepover
Korsak makes fun of Frost	Jane wears a dress	Maura doesn’t understand something	Jane uses her cuffs	Jane drinks Coffee

Okay guys, that's what I've got so far, tell me which squares you think need replaced, which ones work really well, which ones are iffy. If you have more ideas for squares then I'll be able to make a larger variety of bingo cards, so more people can play. Just give me ideas! 
 

The First Gay Ladies Oscar Bingo

Alright my dear ladies. Here's how it works. 

The first person to call Bingo is our overall winner.

Various levels of winning can be decided at the end, based upon total number of bingos per person and total number of squares filled in. 

Tweeting should involve the hashtag #gayoscarbingo 

Boards are assigned as follows: 
@TtownAmstaff - 2
@MormonLesbian - 3
@Gappy45 - 4
@Ebenn27 - 5
@Emeraldfirefly - 7
@StuffMyMuffin - 11
@WentTheDistance - 12

boards can be located here : http://www.jessicajonesdesign.com/downloads/oscar_bingo_2011.pdf 

There is plenty of room for bets, both side bets and for the overall winner.  


If anyone wants to suggest an overall bet for the title of  "Gay Oscar Bingo Champion" I'm all ears. 


Current known sides bets are:


@Ebenn27 vs. @Gappy45 - the winner chooses the losers Twitter Picture for the rest of the week.  Winner Ebenn27
@MormonLesbian vs. @TtownAmstaff - winner gets pantsless pics of the loser. Winner MormonLesbian
@MormonLesbian vs. @WentTheDistance - if ML wins, WTD has to change picture to LAD, if WTD wins, ML has to write a blog about how awesome WTD is.  Winner WentTheDistance
@Gappy45 vs. @WentTheDistance - winner picks a body part and the loser has to paint it 
and take pictures Winner WentTheDistance
@Ebenn27 vs. @MormonLesbian - if EB wins, she gets to pick ML's next blog topic, if ML wins, EB has to tweet something creepy about her undying love for ML every day for a week.Winner Ebenn27
@Ebenn27 vs. @EmeraldFirefly - loser has to tweet about how awesome the winner is every day for the next two weeks. Winner Ebenn27
@Ebenn27 vs. @TtwonAmstaff - if EB wins, she gets to pick a ridiculous quiz for TA's next exam, if TA wins, EB has to tweet @Angie_Harmon to ask for prayers for something ridiculous Winner Ebenn27

First to Call Bingo and Grand Champion of Gay Oscar Bingo: Ebenn27
 (the overall winner receives one homemade item from each participant)


Second to Call Bingo: StuffMyMuffin 
Third to Call Bingo: WentTheDistance
Fourth to Call Bingo: MormonLesbian
Fifth to Call Bingo: EmeraldFirefly

Words Have Power

Ladies and .... more ladies. It's no secret, at least in the twitter and blog aspect of my life, that I'm gay. But it is a secret in my professional life and with the majority of my family. So, like many, I'm forced to bite my tongue and hold back comments when I'd much rather be screaming at the top of my lungs about the problems I see. On that note... I should explain where this whole line of thought is coming from.

My students are currently writing persuasive papers. Because I'm the awesome teacher that I am the kids are getting to pick their own topics to write about. Mostly this is working out well and the kids are getting a chance to write about something that interests them. The problem for me is that I am a rather liberal individual who is currently teaching in a rural, fairly conservative environment. As I've gone through and checked everyone's topic I've seen several that make me cringe internally and several that make me exceptionally proud of my students.  But I've done the responsible thing and held my tongue and kept my political beliefs out of my kids work. 

I have one student who is arguing against Gay Marriage. And let's be honest, I know not everyone agrees with my opinions on the matter and I respect that.  But when my student makes the argument that Gay Marriage is wrong because "it's gross" then I just want to tear the hair out of my head. I can accept people arguing against my view point if they are informed. I can even understand it if they make religious arguments, but when the arguments are so completely uninformed and excessively biased it find it difficult to maintain my subjectivity. I know they're just students, I know they're young and I can't expect them to be fully informed about subjects, but I wish I could. I wish I could expect them to make logical and reasonable arguments. 


I wish I could remind my students that they are making arguments about people's lives. I think they need reminded that their arguments have the power to affect others, that words have power over people. I want to remind my students that even if they disagree with the people they are writing about, they are still human beings. Every person deserves respect. Every statistic, every percentage, each one is a person. They are not just numbers, they are human beings with feelings, with families, with life. My students need to understand the power of their words and I don't think they have any clue. 


Time and time again I have called students out on their use of language that is unacceptable in my class. And I'm not talking about four letter words, I'm talking about the use of the word Gay and the word Retarded. I don't accept those in my class and I will not tolerate them being used in any derogatory form. But my students don't understand how powerful those words can be. I do. I know how many students feel bullied because of the words their classmates used. I know how many students are pushed into depression and towards suicide because their classmates throw around words carelessly without taking into consideration how they affect their classmates. 


How can I let one student make such oblivious arguments against Gay Marriage when I know a student in one of my other classes is arguing for Gay Marriage because of their two mothers.  I can not change my students opinions. I can not force them to believe one way because of how it affects me but I owe my students a safe and welcoming environment. How can I promise that when one student is arguing something that in some way or another threatens the beliefs and safety of another? 


I'm not even sure how I'll be able to grade the one paper without letting my own personal feelings on the matter interfere. I'm doing everything I can to be impartial, I'm the adult, it's my responsibility. But I'm not sure how I'll be able to do. 


How would you protect the voice of one student and perceived sense of safety of another? How would you grade a students paper that so blatantly goes against everything you are and everything you stand for? How can you retain your impartiality, how can I? How can I teach my students everything they need to know for the test and still teach them what they need to know to be successful in their own lives outside of school? 


I've officially asked more questions then I've answered tonight. Sorry. And now it's time to finish watching D.E.B.S. before I fall asleep. Good night my lovelies. <3

How being a nerd ruined my love life.

Being a nerd has ruined my chances at ever having a long lasting relationship...

That probably doesn't make any sense, but let me explain. I am a nerd, I am a huge nerd, I love Legos, Star Wars, Hot Wheels and Video Games. I love Sci-Fi and Fantasy, I spend my free time playing video games and reading as many books as I can get my hands on. Because of this, I've realized it will never be possible to find a woman who will have all the necessary nerdy requirements on my mental check list. 

So for shits and giggles, let's take a look at my mental check list and see why I am forever doomed in love..

1. Must love, or at the very least appreciate Star Wars.

2. Needs to generally acknowledge that the original three films of Star Wars are the best.

3. Ideally would accept both  my love of Star Wars and my appreciation of Star Trek.
        (Yeah, I'm a nerd when my top three requirements are all about Star Wars)

4. must love dogs! (seriously.... I've had dogs all my life and pretty much always will) 

5. If not a huge video game nerd (like me) then at least needs to be willing to try to play games with me 

6. should have a fondness for most things lego. (including video games)

7. literacy is mandatory.

8. an appreciation of most films from Mel Brooks is also needed. 

9.  I love the idea of global domination, mostly through playing RISK and Monopoly... so I need someone willing to play board games with me.

10. musicals.... I love them, it'd help if my gal did too.

11.beyond all my silly nerd moments, I need someone who can make me laugh and make me smile. And frankly.... I don't smile all that much anymore. 


Mostly this was an excuse to enjoy my own nerdiness and add pictures in for a semi-entertaining blog post. And this would have been more entertaining if I weren't already struggling to keep my eyes open. Besides I have a dog snoring away at my feet and Star Wars: A New Hope playing on the DVD player. 


Night my lovelies!

I am Proud

I don't want anyone reading this to doubt that I am proud of who I am. I am proud of who I love and I am proud of this community that I belong to. I am especially proud of our community. 

We are diverse. And I am thankful for that every day of my life. And I am proud of that.

I am proud of those of us who hide in order to serve our country.

I am proud of those of us who stand up every day and tell our children that it gets better.

I am proud of those of us who refuse to let their voices be silenced. 

I am proud every time a member of our community stands up for what is right. I am proud for those who worked against proposition 8, of those who marched in DC last year, of those who have stood up and said enough is enough.

I am proud of our children for not giving up. 

I am proud of our adults for not giving up.

I am proud of our artists, our teachers, our politicians, our students, our parents, our children. 

I am proud of us.

I AM PROUD.

Playing it Straight, How I keep my job.

My voice isn't heard in the din of the teacher's lounge. I'm 1 of 10, surrounded by professionals who know nothing about me. They don't know my secret, the one thing that must remain hidden if I am to make my career successful. I must guard my one secret and close in on myself. It is for my own protection. But also to protect my students. This is for the best.

Those are the notes I made to myself during my lunch hour earlier this week. I can't even begin to explain what it's like to sit in a lunchroom with people I know and respect and have to hide large portions of who I am. I live in a state where I can lose my job because of who I am and who I love. I work in a field where being different, being who I am is not accepted. 

I sat in the lounge today and listened to my colleagues talk about a family with two mothers. And I found it to be interesting when two of them immediately followed their statements up with "But I have no problem with it." Were they making sure that the other teachers knew they were accepting or were they just trying to cover their asses? 

No one I'm working with in the school know that I'm gay. And honestly, no one can know.  There is no legal protection for me when it comes to my employment. More than that, I'm currently working in a fairly conservative rural district, where if my sexuality were to be known parents would likely be lining up to complain about me. More than likely I wouldn't be allowed to coach track because parents would have concerns over their child's safety.

Every day I set foot in that building I am forced to lie about who I am. It wears upon my soul. I hate lying, and I especially hate lying to my students. I hate lying to my colleagues. I'd like to be able to call some of these people my friends, but how can we be friends when I can't be myself?

I'm lying every day I set foot in that building, and I'm afraid I'm going to be lying every day I go to work for the next 35 years. The sad thing is that my need to lie, to hide who I am, is affecting more than just my current situation. And I'm sure this will sound insane to the 5 or so of you reading this, but as long as I have to lie about who I am to keep my job, I can't see myself having a relationship. My friends don't understand this, but I'll explain it to the best of my ability.

Every day I'm in the classroom I share parts of my life and my history with my students. It build a relationship and helps make connections. Over the course of a school year students and teachers end up learning a lot about each other. Students know about their teachers families, their kids, their lives and the things that fill up their spare time. Right now it's easy, because I don't have to lie. When my kids ask if I'm single I don't have to lie and say no, because they can't know if I have a girlfriend. When kids ask if I'm married, I can just say no. I'm sure this isn't making a lot of sense to anyone but me. But i don't want to have to lie to my students any more than necessary. But it's more than that.

If I'm with someone, if I have someone I love, someone I want to spend the rest of my life with... I don't want to have to hide that. I don't want to have to lie and hide that I'm in a relationship, that I'm with someone who makes me happy. It's not fair to my hypothetical significant other to have to be hidden because of my professional life. It's not fair to my hypothetical future children, and it's not fair to me. I guess following my logic the only way to be fair to myself, my students and any woman that I might love in the future is to not allow myself to have a relationship, to not have love. I know, it sounds crazy. 

But maybe dedicating my life to educating kids and doing my best to protect them is worth it?  I hope it is anyway. 

I'm a bad, bad blogger. (not like that you pervs)

Alright, no lies, life is hellish and hectic. So I have been seriously distracted and seriously bad at blogging in the past two weeks. For this I apologize. I'll try not to do it again, but in other news, on to the post.


Currently I am teaching 8th grade Language Arts. And honestly.... I love it. I actually love going in to work every morning and I love what I do and how I spend my days. At the same time it's incredibly frustrating at points simply because my kids aren't doing their work or their reading. It's frustrating, but that's not what this is about.

The majority of us know, or have an inkling of how cruel kids can be. Most of us have heard the derogatory comments and insults thrown at the LGBT community and especially the kids in our family. Every day I step into a classroom I know that it's possible I'm going to hear the word gay thrown around as an insult. I know how damaging that can be to students, to children, to anyone. I refuse to put up with it, I won't accept it in my classroom and I make sure my students know it.


Which brings me to the events of today. For starters, I can't really talk right now. I spent most of my weekend sick and in bed, so when I went back to school yesterday I couldn't talk at all.  I had a good bit of my voice back this morning so I was able to teach, but by the time I got to sixth period my voice was fading rapidly and my kids were getting more and more disruptive and distracted.  Midway through my sixth period class one student made a comment about Justin Bieber. Another followed that comment up with "He's so gay." While many of us might question Bieber's sexuality, that's a bit different than the context from the comment in class.


I pretty much lost my cool with the student and the class as a whole. I made it abundantly clear to my class that I won't tolerate gay being used as a derogatory term in my classroom.


I don't get how teachers can let their students get away with saying it. I don't, and know others that don't accept it. But there are plenty of teachers and administrators and parents who don't give a damn if students are calling each other gay or not. It infuriates me. But I know the statistics, and frankly, I am one of the statistics. I know how it feels to be on the other side of the word, and I know how much it can hurt, and I will do everything I can to protect my students like no one protected me. I will stand up for my students, because I know how it feels to have no one stand up for me.  


I won't stand idly by while my students torment and bully each other. I won't stand by the side as more and more of my students become statistics. My students might think they have no voice, but they do, and more importantly they have someone who is going to stand up to protect that voice and allow it to be heard.


They have a voice and I will not ignore it. 






End of tonights ramble fest of blog writing. I'm exhausted and can barely keep my eyes open. Hopefully I'll be more coherent tomorrow. Night folks.